Monday, October 22, 2012

Joy to the Swedes

See, I'm sitting here in office but what I actually want is for the lights to dim, a disco ball to pop out of the ceiling and for me to be suddenly wearing a sparkly dress as I slow dance to Patience with a boy in a snazzy suit. So snazzy it makes my eyes, ladyparts and miserly sensibilities twinge.

In a nutshell that is prom, yes?

This romaance mood is solely because of this one email I got from Four Fountains Spa saying they wanted to give me a free massage. Now the only massage propositions I've gotten are from posters in the ladies train compartment. One beauty was offering "Therapeutic massage. Foot massage+back massage+vaginal massage. No charge". So after being suspicious as to why a spa would offer this to me, of 5 blog readers fame, I said yes please.

So anyway. Yesterday I got one (free!) Swedish massage from there. It was ohgodd so good. It was the first time I was getting some proper spa type treatment so I didn't know what was more acurate, the Hollywood representation of all this (it is) or the YouP0rn representation (it's not). Everything smells yum, there are pretty dim lights everywhere and a cute man at the reception. One also looks straight out of an exercise machine infomercial and feels like a shiny happy throughly content beached whale once the actual massage is over. Good people, these guys. I am very much in favour of giving them money in exchange for happiness. So much happiness.

Now I need someone to mail and offer to give me some sparkly dresses. Don't be shy.


Anonymous said...

Oh damn. Now I'm off the office mode. Into spa mode. (Kudos to the writing)
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