Home

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Divya versus Divya

Without further ado. Divya versus Divya.

Act I:
Dibba: This is my cat. Shrimati Jane Iyengar. She began life as Jane Eyre. Then I Tamilicised her.
Me: You should have named her Iyer na then.
Dibba: Wtf. I’m Iyengar. *pride*
Me: Bloody caste obsessed. You changed the cats caste!
Dibba: Iyers are our sworn emenies...enemies...emenemies...whatever. They secretly practice witchcraft. And do black magic.
Me: Yes I love you too emenemie o’ mine.
Dibba: You're Iyer eh? Er… when I say witchcraft, I mean, of course, the HAWT kind. And er… black magic is in fashion also. Also, I love black. Black is good. And magic is always hawt. (Reminder to self - must stop nervous chatter) Er… I LOVE YOU DIVI!
Me: Sigh.. You just say that because you don't want me to turn you into a newt.

Act II:
Dibba: Oh no. Everyone thinks I am a social mongoose :( Er... or mole. Mole, yes. Mole. Not mongoose.
Me: No I like mongoose better. Social mongoose... Sounds so cute. Like a mongoose taking a day off from killing snakes and going for a party and meeting all its groupies. “Ooh you kill snakes... Dangerous… What a turn on… Your hole in the wall or mine?”
Dibba: But mongoose is not technically correct. Mole is the dude that digs and is mole-like...
Me: Correct shorrect. I like mongoose better.
Dibba: Social mongoose just sounds 'cute'. Cute' is not HOT. Would you stop trying to take away from my great and steamy sex appeal? As, er… a mole? (Shit that didn’t work).
Me: Fine... You want to be an unsightly black mark on someone’s body, suit yerself. YOU could be having hot mongoose sex right now but nooo…
Dibba: My dear zoologically challenged woman... I was picturing the hawt black-as-midnight, velvet skinned. silent-as-death antisocial animal, and you HAD to pick the grandiose freckly things.

The end. For now.

10 comments:

St.Banger said...

more please

ramsub said...

@ st banger, come live in our hostel

Anonymous said...

...and the winner iiiiis.... Divya!!!

(Uh, kinda redundant, that...)

Ok, score for the Wiccan-transmogrifying-mongoose-loving black-magic-woman!

(Mongoose fetish... that's a new one, that is... and a mole???)

Bedazzled said...

lol! .. u women on dope?

Divya said...

This is how we normally talk, woman :D

Australopithecus said...

be politically correct. apparently it is called "african american" magic now :P

Sorcerer said...

lol... it was too short..
confusing...
and my mind was like..its a womans thing..and... you are not supposed to understand the encrypted conv.

Spaz Kumari said...

CHAT TRANSCRIPTS ARE NOT FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION.

(grrrr.)

coolsals said...

lol....is this the cat pic that u have sent me....the big black fluffy cat....loved the conversation....it reminds me of us talking utter nonsense when we were drunk over coffee......:) :P

Deepak Gopalakrishnan said...

Good lord! :D